Little Orphan Anakin
2: Questions, Questions, Too Many Questions
In Phantom Menace, there
are only two Sith: a master, and an Apprentice. Darth Maul gets the chop,
leaving, presumably, a vacancy.
In Attack of the Clones,
Saruman is an evil Jedi, throwing around Emperor-style bolts of lightening
which even Darth Maul showed no signs of doing.
Do we conclude:
1: That Saruman has replaced
Maul as Palpatine's apprentice, having turned to the Dark Side at some point in
the ten years since Phantom Menace?
2: That there are other
societies of evil Jedi apart from the Sith, and Saruman belongs to one of
those?
3: That Yoda was mistaken, and
there are sometimes three Sith at once?
4: That Yoda's remark at the end
of Phantom Menace (that he doesn't know whether Darth Maul was master or
apprentice) foreshadows a clever twist: Maul was the master, Palpatine the
apprentice, and Saruman was a sort of apprentice in waiting, ready to take on
the role when the master died and everyone moved up once?
5: That Lucas is making it up as
he goes along?
I always feel that a Doctor
Who scriptwriter is not really trying as soon as the expression "evil
renegade Time Lord" is mentioned. I feel that "previously
un-mentioned tribe of evil Jedi" betrays a similar kind of shorthand
laziness.
In Empire Strikes Back,
Vader knows of the existence of "the Son of Skywalker"; but in Return
of the Jedi, he is surprised to learn that he also has a daughter. It is
even possible that Obi-Wan does not know of the existence of Leia,: in Empire
Strikes Back he does not know of the existence of Yoda's "other".
In A New Hope we are told that Anakin-Vader "wanted
Luke to have his lightsabre when he was old enough". We are also told that
when Vader left Kenobi, he was still only a learner.
Thus, we require a situation in
which --
A: A still-good,
still-apprentice Anakin has asked Obi-Wan to pass his lightsabre onto his son,
but doesn't know that he has a daughter.
B: Although Luke is fostered
with Anakin's stepbrother on his home-planet, and although he is living openly
under his real name, and although Vader knows of his son's existence, he never
goes after him there.
C: Leia remembers her mother,
but Luke has no memory of his
To pull all this together, I
think we are going to have to have some enormous hand-wave. I think that Vader
is going to lose his memory. Or, perhaps his conversion to the Dark Side will
be conceived of as a Jekyl and Hyde transformation, which leaves him perceiving
Anakin Skywalker as an entirely separate person. This might even make Kenobi's
claim that Anakin's transformation meant that Luke's father was destroyed
literally true. I predict that Episode III will go something like this:
1: Amidala gets pregnant. This
is kept secret from everyone; no-one outside Naboo even knows they are married.
2: Anakin says goodbye to his
pregnant wife, and goes to fight in the Clone Wars with Obi Wan, who for some
reason is being referred to as General Kenobi, and "serving" Bail
Organa.
3: Anakin sees that the galaxy
is collapsing into chaos. He still believes in his "benevolent
dictatorship" theory as expressed to Amidala in Attack of the Clones.
He states that he wants to help Palpatine bring order to the galaxy. Obi-Wan
forbids him. Anakin resigns from the Jedi order, and, still a learner leaves
Obi Wan. At this point, of course, he doesn't know that Palpatine moonlights as
Darth Sideous.
4: Palpatine, tells him about
the power of the Dark Side. He tells him that if he becomes a Sith he will be
the greatest Jedi ever, all-powerful, and capable of even stopping people
dying. He probably takes him to a high place and breaks out in an allegory. At
any rate, Anakin gives way and starts to undergo Jekyl and Hyde
transformations, from Anakin to Vader and back again.
5: In his Vader form, he helps
Palpatine hunt down the Jedi. But in a lucid moment, he warns Amidala and tells
her to hide his child with his mother's husband on Tatooine, where he will be
overlooked by Palpatine.
6: Little does he know that he
does not just have a son, but twins!
7: Amidala does as she is told.
Yoda escorts the new-born boy to Tatooine, stopping off briefly on Dagobah on
the way. ("There's something familiar about this place!") But she
takes the girl to Alderaan where Baal Organa will protect them.
8: The trade federation trace
Amidala to Alderaan. They come to kill her. She gives her child to Baal to take
care of. The trade federation assumes that Leia is Baal's kid, and no-one sees
any need to disabuse them of this misconception. The trade federation kills
Amidala. She recites some bad dialogue, and expires.
9: Palpatine doesn't think to
look for Luke on Tatooine as obviously no-one would be stupid enough to hide
Vader's son on Vader's home planet. Vader, as long as he is Vader (and not
Anakin) doesn't know where is son is. But years later, when he finds out that
the name of the young pilot who was strong in the Force turns out to be
"Skywalker", the long buried memories of his previous identity start
to return.
10: Vader is sent by Palpatine
to kill Obi-Wan. There is a big fight. At the last minute, Obi-Wan says
something like "By the way, did you know you now have a son?". This
makes Vader turn back into Anakin for a second. He hands his lightsaber to
Obi-Wan and says "Could you make sure my son gets this", and then
jumps into the fiery pit.
12: Obi-Wan, assuming that Vader
is dead, goes to Tatooine, partly because it is remote and partly because he
gets to be near the Anakin's child. Presumably, it is a few years before he finds
out that Vader survived and has acquired a suit of armour and a breath mask.
13: All the other Jedi are
killed.
14: Twenty years pass, and Star
Wars begins.
I trust that is all perfectly
clear.